Match Report - Boots Ladies

Editor's Note: This week has seen American Independence Day (1776), the invention of the bikini (1946), the birth of the Dalai Lama (1935) and a fantastic offer on gas barbecues at Tesco (19.99)

Our first encounter with Boots this season was a close fought contest, in which the girls overcame a small first innings deficit to triumph by 20 points. With confidence in the camp high after last week's demolition job on Seedfield, could the girls continue their push towards end of season glory? The league table showed just how close a contest it was likely to be, too, with both teams knowing that defeat would surely end any chance of catching the leading duo.

Having arrived at Clarence Park we were met by possibly the angriest man in recorded history. Lord Angry of Woolfold descended, resplendent in high couture, and proceeded to embark on a 15 minute expletive-filled tirade against M&S shoppers. Particularly those who order a black coffee ... and then demand milk to accompany it. It was truly marvellous to hear the Lord in full flow, although given that it was within earshot of half of Bury by the time he'd finished, it's unlikely he'll be invited to any childrens parties this year.

The pre-match throw about arrived and disaster struck. All was going well, the girls were raring to go, warming up nicely and then BOOM. A rapid throw from your erstwhile reporter connected with the end of Allisoni's finger and our star tips girl was rendered impotent for the evening. She often gestures with her fingers in my direction, but on this occasion it was in pain ... I am so sorry Alli! Anyway, this did at least give her the opportunity to sit on the sidelines and listen to the red-faced ranter.

And so to the game. Totts took to the field to encouragment from the massed ranks on the sidelines. The glamour twins, Alex "Stop Start" and SJD, had arrived by now so there was plenty of support. The home side got off to a positive start, with a couple of quick rounders before our girls began to get a grip. Indeed we fielded like demons first time up, with a good catch in the deep from Fluffy and some sharp work from Trish at backstop. Indeed a feature which impressed me tonight was the work of both backstops - each did really well, and both showed some excellent accuracy with their throws to run out batters approaching first (and, in one case, second) base. So hats off to them.

Our innings started brightly, with a number of 1s and 2s, but rounders were proving elusive. Danielle, who had dazzled on her prom the previous Friday, dazzled slightly less with the bat tonight, and there was a mini-collapse mid innings. The Boots bowler was proving really tricky to get away, as she sent down quite a few no balls, which seemed to upset our rhythm somewhat. We tried valiantly, and managed two late rounders. It was clear this was going to be a very tight game (just like the first), and so as the innings closed there was some disagreement about who would be leading. To the surprise of some, Totts were up 65-58 at halfway.

The Boots second innings started well ... for Totts. Several girls were dismissed in quick time and it looked like we might romp to victory. Danielle and Michelle were being worked hard in the backfield (why does that sound slightly dodgy?), and a couple of rounders were notched. Possibly the most crucial phase arrived at the end of the Boots innings, as two girls managed to acquire quite a few points with a mix of cheeky running and some powerful hitting into the open spaces. All credit to them. With "Holiday" Debbie off the field, Alex was on in her place, and her strong arm was also proving useful. The innings ended abruptly with some good work from Trish, and the scene was set for what would surely be a crucial 4th innings.

Tension was now running high. I had to go off and pace around the paths, such was my level of nerves, and with everyone well aware of the high stakes at hand, our innings started nervously. We seemed to be on top of things in the early going, yet more no balls mixed with some solid running. Once again though, rounders were very rare indeed and it took a moment of Danielle-like recklessness for Michelle to get round the bases and bring cheers from the sidelines. Katie and Trish were performing admirably, but dismissals came thick and fast in the middle and we were soon down to the last couple of players. With no-one quite sure how many points were needed, Katie and Michelle both managed rounders, but when they were dismissed the game was over.

The scores were announced and Boots had avenged their early season defeat by running out winners 146-133. A valiant effort from Totts, in a game played in good spirit and with plenty of aggression and fight on display (in a positive way). Hard luck, girls, you gave it a good go.

Tonight's comedy finale is a tribute to Lord Angry!